Monday, August 3, 2009

Raised on Crap: My Childhood Cartoons pt.1

Remember how much fun it was to wake up on Saturday mornings and be emotionally raped as children by cartoons like this:


Shows that were designed to sell toys by re-telling the same seven stories over and over again through ugly animation and awful dialogue. That is actually what the producers of these cartoons told their animators, and they weren't allowed to venture outside of those seven stories. My favorites were the "let's share everything" episodes.


So why didn't we realize as children that we were being subjected to crap that was being written by cartoon writers too retarded to even construct a sentence? Have you gone back and watched any of these shows since growing up? I think a lot of people do, and they just tell themselves, "oh we just thought it was good because we were kids, and it is made for children", But have you gone back and watched cartoons that were made before the 1980s? Cartoons made by cartoonists? Go watch a Bob Clampett cartoon, or a Fleischer Popeye or Betty Boop short, or a Tex Avery cartoon.


Did you know that all of the Looney Tunes DVDs that were recently released by Warner Bros. have warnings on them "May Not Be Suitable for Children. Looney Tunes are intended for the Adult Collector". What?! Since when have Looney Tunes deserved a parental advisory? It's actually since the term was coined by cartoon executives "Imitable Behavior". This means that when Elmer Fudd blows off Daffy Duck's face with a rifle, that your children might not be able to separate this from reality.


A good example of "imitable behavior" censorship is with The Ren & Stimpy Show, where the entire animation studio was fired by Nickelodeon executives because they felt the cartoon violence would lead innocent children down a path of self-destruction. Ren & Stimpy is actually one of the only modern day examples of television animation (or any animation for that matter) done right.


When I was a child I loved Disney cartoons, until I realized one day that they were completely void of any personality or humor. But that is an entire different post altogether. There are some exceptions with Disney cartoons; have you ever watched Song of the South? Check out the animation in this film, it's some of the best ever produced by any studio.


Remember when the Hollywood whore Steven Spielberg started dabbling in animation? He brought us horrible crap like this:


Tiny Toon Adventures was supposed to bring back the "creator-driven cartoon", and be reminiscent of Termite Terrace, but it too was also raped by retarded Hollywood executives. That's where the job position of "cartoon writer" came from. The one requirement for this position is that you can't draw. Executives don't want artists anywhere near the responsibilities of what goes into a cartoon.


What blows my mind is that children seem a lot smarter nowadays than they did when we were young. My cousins were learning different languages at an age that I was jamming toy trucks up my nose as a kid. Why should they be denied funny cartoons? Who Framed Roger Rabbit almost brought back "cartoony" cartoons, but for those of you who have done your Disney homework, you know that Roger Rabbit is no longer welcome in the Disney family.


So what do you think? Do you think that our kids should be sheltered from Bugs Bunny, Ren and Stimpy, Tom and Jerry, and all the other characters that network executives have deemed too evil for children?

Isn't it much crueler to subject them to this?:



written by Jason Anders

4 comments:

  1. I really like this article. I enjoy Looney Tunes, Tex Avery, Ren and Stimpy, and the other cartoons that don't dumb themselves down for the expected IQs and attention spans of kids. I'm going to have to disagree with you on Tiny Toons and Animaniacs, though. Although I agree that the producers of Tiny Toons tried too hard at times to "cool up" the content of their programs, both of these shows, while not reaching the eccentric heights of Ren & Stimpy, aimed their content slightly above the heads of their demographics. They trusted that the kid viewers would keep up. And we did. Neither of these shows dumbed down their content. I learned my states and capitols from Wakko, along with several foreign countries I still remember to this day.

    I recently purchased the Tom & Jerry Chuck Jones Collection on DVD, and learned from one of the documentaries included in the set that when the large studios began to phase out their animated shorts departments, Hannah and Barbara moved on to the limited animation tactics on television that you spoke of. Here they found a second life with The Flinstones, Jetsons, and other popular series that provided the template for so much of the watered down animated shows you wrote about. Not to diss those early shows; without them we would have no Simpsons, no Futurama, none of the popular animated shows aimed at older audiences we have come to know and love today. Chuck Jones, on the other hand, stuck to his guns and refused to change mediums and sacrifice his art form, which I find commendable.

    (Side note: If you haven't seen it before, and are interested in groundbreaking work in the television realm of limited animation, check out Wait Till Your Father Gets Home, a short-lived primetime animated show from the early 70s. It deals with social, political, and familial issues of the day, and many of its humorous takes on these issues still ring true today. I know you can get the first season on DVD. Check it out. Highly recommended.)

    As far as programming today is concerned, you will sadly still find a lot of studios adhering to the same dumdum standards we were subjected to as children. However, some shows still dare to fly faster than their lowest common demographic denominators. Foster's Home for Imaginary Friends, The Grimm Adventure of Billy and Mandy, and (yes) Powerpuff Girls all expect their young viewers to comprehend and keep up, and it makes me glad to know that today's kids have a handful of bright spots in their cartoon canon.

    Thanks so much for writing about one of my favorite topics! Keep up the good work.

    -jLn.

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  2. oh, and i love me some brer rabbit.

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  3. Hanna Barbera were geniuses in their early works on television. Their Tom and Jerry shorts were light years beyond the Chuck Jones animated features... Chuck Jones' Tom and Jerry were really boring in comparison.

    The Hanna Barbera television shows like Huckleberry Hound and the first season of The Flintstones were wonderful. Maybe my part 2 will focus more on that.

    As for The Simpsons, Family Guy, Futurama... I can't stand these shows, they are all created by cartoon writers who don't know anything about cartoons... they should be writing live-action sitcoms, not making animation.

    I will also elaborate more on why Animaniacs and Tiny Toons were awful and destroyed any chance cartoons had of being creator-driven in the next post. Congratulations JJ, you've got cartoon dorks on your hands now!

    -Jason

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  4. I'm excited for part two. and psyched for some good debate on one of my favorite topics.

    ...and you're right. the HB T&Js are classics; I just have a soft spot for the Chuck Joneses. they scratch my roadrunner itch.

    as far as killing the notion of creator driven animation, i see what you're getting at, but i think cartoon network has come a long way in supporting the creator. and simultaneously the stoner demographic, for better or worse.

    not a big family guy fan, but as for them and the others, i think animation gives them license as sitcom writers to go places live action just doesn't allow. shows like andy richter controls the universe, and even arrested development push those boundaries, but they still operate under those live action limits. whether this helps further the art of animation is certainly debatable.

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